Everywhere I go, I see beautiful ladies of marital age still
single without a ring on their finger- from corporate offices to markets, to
Churches, to institutions, to social gatherings, just name it, and it’s just as
if there was a war that consumed half of the single guys in Nigeria, I pray not.
This issue always border me a lot because it has resulted to
so many other societal decay like- high rate of prostitution, increasing number
of single mothers, increased rate of infidelity amongst married men (because
the single ladies now seem to be sharing the few married men with their wives)
which in turn increases the rate of divorce, desperacy, etc.
Read the responses I got when I interviewed some Nigerians on this topic...make sure you read it below...
During my findings, I engaged some single guys in a
one-on-one conversation. Read below what some of them have to say:
LINUS OKEKE
ME: Are you
married?
LINUS OKEKE: No
ME: What
happened? Don’t you like marriage?
LINUS OKEKE: Of
course I love marriage
ME: So what
happened you are not married yet?
LINUS OKEKE: In
fact, this is a big problem in Nigeria now, and it will even get worse by the
day, ask me why? Imagine all these old men who call themselves managers and
directors giving good jobs freely to girls in Nigeria, and then subject guys to
series of aptitude test upon aptitude test, and only to employ just a few guys.
Now tell me, how will a guy who hasn’t fed himself twice a day due to
unemployment wish to marry after suffering to graduate from school? The old men
and foolish politicians in Nigeria are the cause of these problem and it will
soon consume them and their daughters!
SEUN FAWOSE
ME: Are you
married?
SEUN: No
ME: What happened
you are not married?
SEUN: see eh,
make I tell you the truth, Nigeria no go better again I swear! Politicians don
spoil this country. See, I no be graduate but I get sense wella, and some kind
things dey pain me gan. Imagine like this eh, you go see one fine boy, a
graduate ni o, him go be driver for one small girl weh no even sabi book reach
that boy, just because say the girl don carry her something go give one old man
weh come nak her come give am job. This thing weh I de tell you now happen for
my area so. This boy, Tunde, him sabi book die I swear, and him na graduate.
The guy don find job soteh him come taya before him come get one job now as a
driver weh dey drive one small girl weh de friend the owner of the company
where him dey work, that kind thing good? That kind thing de encourage person
to go school, tell me?.....
Guest 3
ME: Are you
married?
Guest 3: No
ME: What
happened? Don’t you like marriage?
Guest 3: I love
marriage, not even like. Like ke?
ME: So why are
you still single?
Guest 3: Money
na. I didn’t go to school, na handwork I learn shaa, and the thing no de too
move like that you get? If to say I don get enough money now, na that time I go
fit get mind approach the kind girl weh I like propose to her. And as you know
na, our girls no de like guys weh no get money, in fact, them no even wan look
your side at all.
PETER OGBEIHE
ME: Are you
married?
PETER: No
ME: Why now?
Peter: to marry
in Nigeria now na money o, and where you see the money? Like me now, I
graduated from UNIBEN in 2006, served in 2007/2008, come manage get one small
work here in Lagos in 2009, that’s after one year of NYSC. If I tell you how
much weh they de pay me, you go cry. But do you know that one of my course
mate, a girl, Rosemary by name, she had problem so she couldn’t serve with us,
but as soon as she finished her NYSC in 2009, she got a job with a very big
company, ask me how she take get the work? One man see am for road carry am,
from there the man give her card make she call am, and that was how she got the
job.
So the problem in Nigeria now is this- girls are getting the
best jobs courtesy of- woman power and our old men foolishness and promiscuity,
so most guys that wish to marry like me now, don’t have the money to marry
because I no wan make my children suffer wetin I suffer for this world. And the
worst part is that once a girl gets a good job in Nigeria, she sees herself as
a small god, and any guy that isn’t working in a better company that where she
is working or not earning bigger money than she is earning is then seen as
below her class and not man enough, and that’s why we have plenty single girls
in Nigeria now. Most of them are arrogant, pompous, filled with pride which is
not good for a lady. Even when they are driving pass you, they can hardly stop
to give you a lift, but guys who have car do it for them. Guys will stop and
pick them, and even befriend them happily, but they will never do that, instead
they will be running after big men and guys with money who already have plenty
girls in their hand, and after those guys use them finish, they will dump them
like trash and you see them shouting- all men all bad, why won’t men be bad when
you are greedy and pompous?
EDNA
ME: You are the
first female I am interviewing today, so tell me, are you married?
EDNA: Nope
ME: Why? Is it
that you don’t want to marry or you haven’t found the right man or no man has
proposed?
EDNA: Anyway, to
be honest with you, if I see a good man now ready to settle down, why won’t I
say yes? But the truth is that we have lesser number of eligible bachelors in
Nigeria presently.
ME: Wow! That’s
an interesting phrase; please can you throw more light on what you mean by-
eligible bachelors please?
EDNA: I don’t
think there is a better way to put it other than the way I already did, please
thank you, I have to go now.
OKON
ME: Are you
married?
OKON: No
ME: Why?
OKON: If you give
me job today, I go marry tomorrow
ME: That’s funny
Okon, you can’t be serious
OKON: Wife na
money na, abi you no know?
JAMES
ME: Are you
married?
JAMES: Not at all
ME: Why?
JAMES: Not ready
yet
ME: What do you
mean by not ready yet?
JAMES: Financially,
everything
ME: Financially,
everything, hmmm….that’s not specific, can you tell me more about it?
JAMES: Naija
girls of today love money pass love, so if you no get money, forget women in
Nigeria, unless you are ready to go for those you don’t really cherish, and
that’s the problem we have now in Nigeria. Most guys are married to the women
they never wished to just because they didn’t have enough money to entice their
dream woman since Nigerian women only love a man based on how much he has, and
I cannot go below my dream in a woman because I hate to cheat; I want to be
married to only my wife, and not marrying to have children and to deceive
family members and friends that I am married and then sleeping around with
other women. In fact, if our women no change, things go worse for them for this
country, mark my word!
Hello Ng blog readers, welcome back, that was just a few of
the responses from people I interviewed on why Nigerian guys of today are
delaying to marry the sisters, and believe me, if I publish all the responses I
got, you will be shocked because some sounded more hateful than normal, so I
had to filter them to make it readable.
And after the opinion sample, I came to the conclusion that
unemployment is the major cause of delayed marriage in Nigeria today, and the
government and all concerned individuals should try and look into this
situation- guys complaining bitterly that better jobs are being given to ladies
for free, sometimes without interview, whereas they (guys) are always subjected
to series of aptitude tests and interviews and at the end, companies take only
a handful of the male applicants, leaving the rest to wander on the street. So
pathetic I must confess.
And to the ladies out there, try and be more realistic with
the present economy situation in Nigeria, the brothers are not smiling again,
cut down your taste and learn to partner with guys with vision and goals, and
believe me, you won’t regret if you apply wisdom. For now, stay blessed until
we meet again sometime, soonest!
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