Why I Hate My Husband

I am sorry to say this- that I hate my husband, but it’s actually what I feel for him right now, and every minute of the day, I regret accepting to marry him, even though I refuse to believe that I married him with my clear eyes with the way he is treating me right now.

Yes, my husband is rich, and also handsome in the eyes of many, of which I myself also know, but he’s ugly to me because his attitude towards me and our twins is ugly.

First, I hate him for luring me into marriage when wasn’t ready to marry; haven’t even graduated from the university. I hate men who think that because they are fortunate to acquire wealth, that they are therefore a blessing to the women kingdom, my husband is amongst such money-miss-road.

For the benefit of those that may decide to rain insults on me, I want to let you all know that I dated my husband for a whole period of two and a half years, and believe me, he was the best man in the world until we officially got married. He would do everything for me- buy me gifts, latest gadgets (phones, laptop, digital camera, etc), to the extent that my friends started eyeing him out of envy. This devil I married as a husband, guised himself under the impression of a loving and caring man for two years, when actually he’s a devil.

If not for my children, and for my family threatening to disown me if I divorce him, I don’t think I will still be answering his wife by now; this is just to tell you what I am going through right now.

I am married to a man who comes home once in three months, and when he finally visits home, he sleeps in a hotel, meanwhile, he built a house equal to a five star hotel; is that what people call husband? I have heard people say that all rich men are like that, but I refuse to believe it because I have friends too who are married to even wealthier men, and by the way, is Obama not wealthy, but he still treats his family with so much love, even though he is the President of America, a sort of World President, so why would anyone try to deceive me that my husband’s attitudes are peculiar to all rich men? Oh yes, I know I am not the only woman experiencing this, but I refuse to live like this forever, and I am giving him a mandate soonest. I am married to a man who jump around hotels sleeping with different campus girls just because he feels he has money, what a fool I call husband. I also pity all those single girls running around with men in exchange for money, they will never go unpunished I pray. Is this how all men behave? If this is their way, I would counsel every single girl out there to stay away from men!

Our beautiful twins are yet to have the feel of a father when they have a living father. He is hardly there for them; hardly make out time to take them out or take his family on a vacation just like other husbands do, is that what people call a husband? Oh yes, some ladies believe that if a man can provide for them financially, what else is there to be worried about, but that’s for weak women who maybe came from a very wretched family background of which I am not one, so I mustn’t continue like this.

People reading this maybe thinking that I am weird, nasty, or suffering from mental disorder for coming out openly to talk rubbish about my husband, but if only you can be in my shoe, then you will understand how it feels to be lured into marriage with the impression of building an enviable home, and only to be betrayed by the person you loved with all your heart. Sometimes too, I feel it could be nemesis, but for csake, I never lived a wayward life even though I dated three different guys before I met my husband, which wasn’t my fault because the first two guys I dated left me with no justifiable reason, and the last one got married out of family pressure, now tell me; is that too much a sin for me to be experiencing all these ordeal? I never dated a married man, neither did I ever dated a guy just for money. Why am I passing through this ordeal, why?

I have sat my said husband down several times to plead with him to please tell me my fault that I am ready to adjust immediately to make him happy so that he can love me once again like he used to, but he would subtly tell me: “honey, I love you and you know it, there’s nothing wrong you did, and I am always proud of you”, please is this how men love? Only in words, while acting the opposite of what they profess to a woman? I really need an answer to this please.

Whenever my husband is home, he has this very stainless portfolio that’s always locked, what is he hiding from me if truly he loves me as his legally married wife? Before we got married, he was a dedicated Christian, and hardly missed a church service and never did he turned down my invitation to my church programme, but nowadays, he feels so reluctant to go to church to worship the God that made him whom he is, and even when I persuade him to attend a certain inspiring church programme, he will end up sleeping in the church while the service is on, please what should I do because my pastor is even getting confused?

I can go on and on, but I don’t want to bore readers with my life ordeal, but below are a summary of the reasons why I dislike my husband presently:

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•       He hardly come home
• -          He prefers to sleep in hotels rather than his beautiful home
• -          He sleeps around with girls because he thinks he is rich
• -          He hardly gives his beautiful twins the required attention they need
• -          He is no longer interested in his Christian religion like he used to be
• -          He keeps secrets from me
• -          He strongly believes in his wealth, and so think I should be thankful that he chose me as his wife
• -          He hardly take me out, even though I am a very pretty, elegant looking lady that can still contest for any beauty pageant and stand a chance of winning the prize
• -          He starves me emotionally and make me tempted to cheat; something I vowed never to dare
• -          He hardly accepts his faults, and never agrees that he is no longer as loving to me as he used to be before we married, please readers advice me candidly from your heart.

Please my dear brothers and sisters, I really need your advice and words of wisdom because I am so confused on what to do right now. Sometimes I feel like divorcing him, but I also think about our twins, and sometimes too, I love him because it’s hard to totally hate someone you used to love so much. Again, I didn’t graduate from the university, though I acquired a degree through part-time studies, which I once disliked with passion, but had no option, and for that, I never went for NYSC- something I desired so much. Though, I am buoyant enough to establish any business of my dream, of which I am planning to do very soon, but still, I am confused on what to do because I really want my husband to love me again and treat me with so much love that he promised and once did. Thank you Ngozika for this opportunity because I was about sharing this on nairaland, but after reading how people react to people’s post on the forum, I changed my mind, and luckily, I stumbled upon your post which made me feel more relieved and convinced that you are a God-fearing man, and may be in the position to counseling me positively, hence reason I chose to send you my story to publish on your website, so that you and other God fearing readers can advice me sincerely like you would advice your sister.

Stay blessed.

MarriedWoman.