Saturday, August 2, 2014

The Advantages And Disadvantages Of Having A Big Bottom As A Lady

 
Just came across this write-up and found it hilariously funny and felt I should share it here for the reading pleasure of my esteemed readers....see the unedited compilation below: lol

Pros:
1. THE CURVES!
I remember a time in America where it was grotesque to have curves or to not be as slender as a stripper pole. Women with even an ounce of fat on them were consider fat or overweight, but with such a growing rate of overweight people in America, a sense of sex appeal has been added to have some curves or baby fat, as some call it. Along with that new sex appeal America has for curvy women, more women with curves are on the cover of magazines, runway shows, and breaking into the music industry, despite opposition.

2. More cushion. No seriously!
Having some extra padding back there isn’t just good for the pushin’! Its also a safety precaution for falls, slips, or if you get shot in the butt it will get lodged in the lard and miss any vital organs.

3. You can use the term bootylicious and not look silly.
When Destiny’s child coined the term in the early 2000s, every woman in the world, especially the ones with NO butt, were using that word and thought it was okay. Well, its not! For women who are actually bootylicious, they can use the word to describe themself and get an, “AMEN” instead of an awkward side eye.

4. You are going to stand out in a crowd, or with a group of friends.
Whenever you are out with friends, people are gonna spot you (well your butt first), and they’ll say “that’s the girl with the big booty!” You are gonna have a discint characteristic and people will remember your name and you for it.

5. Things tend to bounce off it.
I can’t tell you the amount of times my butt has saved me from being hit with balls, or having anything thrown at me. I remember in high school, walking down the hallway, someone threw a football and I bent over to pick something up. The ball literally bounced off my butt and saved me. Amazing things a big butt can do, I tell ya.

6. It makes up for those who have small bosoms.
Well in this case I can’t relate as much because I was blessed with both . But for those women out there that aren’t, having a big butt really does make up for it. A male friend of mine said it best, “I got to have something to hold onto! Either the bottom or the top, something has to be there or I’m out!” It also doesn’t make women look as frail as they would without it. *kanye shrug*

7. You fill out your clothes more.
I don’t know a woman out there that likes being swallowed by her clothe when she is wearing them. All I’m gonna say on this is, the world can appreciate a pair of yoga pants or jeans more with a big booty woman, more than they can with anyone else.

8. People enjoy twerking more when you do it!
I’m sure we all were equally grossed out by Miley Cyrus’ twerking. But I think if Miley was more “blessed” in the butt department, I don’t think there would be too much complaining.

9. It provides more cushion during pregnancy and childbirth.
A lot of women suffer from tailbone pain during preganancy and, in some cases, damage it during childbirth. Apparently, having a big butt can actually help cushion that area and make it less painful. AND, big butts are usually accompanied by child bearing hips which makes pregnancy and childbirth just a little easier.

10. It shields against diabetes.
Having a big butt actually shows that your body is able to metabolize sugars better and turn them into fat. Who would have thought??

11. There are just nice to look at!
Now lets be honest, we’ve all caught ourselves staring at one before, whether its your own or
someone elses.

And NOW THE CONS:

1. People only see your Bottom
While it is nice to look at, its not the only thing! I know for myself, when I meet guys the first thing they say is, “you got a big Bottom!” And don’t get me wrong, its flattering for the first 10 minutes but when every question that comes out of their mouth is regarding my Bottom or he is constantly referring to it, then it gets old FAST.

2. Your subjected to constantly being spanked on the Bottom.
That poo just hurts!

3. “Can I touch it?”
I can’t tell you how many men, and women, see me walking down the street or in the club and ask me if they can touch my butt. This is not Showtime at the Apollo, you NOT come up and touch my Bottom for good luck or for whatever strange reason.

4. Constant stares and murmurs when walking by.
Do you know how irritating it is to walk down the street, minding your own business, and have people stare at you just because you have on a pair of legging or pants that show your figure? My favorite is when you walk past a group of old men and they moan and groan silently, like you can’t hear them. EW! I’ll admit it does make a person feel disgusting, especially with so much unwanted attention on you. Maybe I should just walking around dressed like a nun.

5. Annoying nicknames.
Big booty judy. Phat Up. Donk. Juicy. Jiggle. Like really? The list can go on for so much longer! I’m flattered but, my parents did give me an actual name.

6. You can’t share seats with people.
I can’t tell you how many times my friends have tried to share a seat with me at the movies, or a restaurant and fail miserably. Either they are left with a small corner of the seat, or left on the floor. I’ve cried myself to sleep many nights because of this.

7. Everyone thinks you should be a stripper or a Indecency star.
I take offense to this at times because I’ve got a college degree, and working on a masters. There is no way in hell that I’m gonna let those degrees catch dust, to swing on a pole or a joystick just because I have the body for it. Don’t undermine my intelligence or capabilities.

8. Your limited in the clothes you can wear.
Don’t get me wrong, a booty does fill out your clothes but it can be your downfall as well. I love wearing dresses! Short ones, long ones, formal ones, sun dresses, I love them all! A dress may look harmless when its on the hanger but, I know for myself, when you put it on, it can really make you look like someone in a profession that requires you “be on your knees” alot. Even though I know I do those things, it doesn’t mean that people that see me wont think that! *sigh*

9. It’s an annoying conversation piece.
How many people wanna have, or enjoy having, a conversation with someone, for more that 5 minutes, about why your butt is so big and how it got like that? *crickets*

10. You are always gonna be the chick with the big Bottom.
I find this con to be particularly depressing. Its like no matter what you do, where you go, or whats going on in your life, you are always gonna be known as the chick with the big butt. I don’t know about you but way more than just a walking Bottom.

11. Society still considers you to be overweight.
No matter how sexy you may think your curves are, depending on the circumstances, you are still considered to be overweight. For most women, this can really mess with their self-esteem and drive them to crazy dieting and fitness routines, which usually makes their health even more worse then where they started.

So ladies what do you think? Do you embrace your blessing or do you regret it???
 
Courtesy of: 234pulse

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