Friday, December 21, 2012

Why Women Are To Blame When Their Heart Is Broken


Caution! This article is not meant to pamper you with sentimental words or words of pity; it was written to provoke your wisdom towards getting it right, and to open your eyes to the reasons why you always end up in a heart break, that said, lets move on…

Some readers find my write-ups displeasing, maybe because I don’t romance words to please everyone while leaving the burning issue to keep burning and causing more damages…maybe because I have a strict personality that’s bent on telling the truth in harsh manners, no matter cost.

In as much as some people chose to always condemn and criticize my thought-provoking articles, they always come with full load of eye-opening information and tips that have saved thousands if not millions of lives. Enough said, let’s go straight to the business…why women are to blame when their heart is broken.

In order to help you understand my point, I am going to use a real life scenario to explain my point. I promise to be snappy with the point…and believe me, after reading this, you will stop blaming men for breaking your heart because you will realize that you are the architect of your faith when it comes to relationship.

Before we move on, I want to ask you a simple question, which goes like this:
A job applicant searching for job and an employer employing applicants, who is supposed to be blamed for making the wrong choice?

Maybe you didn’t get the question so well, now, let me break it down.

Would you entirely blame a job applicant searching for a  job, and finally gets one with a low-profile company that careless about its employees, for not being able to secure the best job with a blue chip company, or would you entirely blame a company that advertised for job vacancies and ended up hiring applicants with fake certificates and poor working skills? Who amongst them (the applicant and the hiring company) should be blamed more for his failure?

I want you to answer the above question honestly…if you have answered that question honestly without being biased, then I want to inform you that men are like the applicant searching for job openings to submit their cv for job offer, while women are like the hiring company that seats at the comfort of their interview room, screening and employing the best applicants that submitted cvs to them.

Remember, hardly do women approach men for relationships, the society frowns at that, so it is always the duty of the man to go on the hunt for his better half, while the woman sits in her comfort zone and men of all caliber will be trooping in with their numerous cvs, seeking for her to hire them for a relationship job. Now, who is to blame for making the wrong choice- is it the man that has to pass through series of screenings, rejections, and turn downs by numerous women, and possibly gets an offer from one woman who may not even be his real choice or the woman that sits comfortably in her comfort zone, screening different men, and finally chooses the man with the best qualifications that meets her dream and desire?

Thorough research has shown that the two major reasons majority of women end up in a heart break, or will I say, wrong relationship are choice and attitude. What do I mean by choice? It means that their problem begins with the person they accepted to date, while attitude means their character and behavior in the relationship after accepting to date the person.

Choice: most women of today make their choice of relationship and even marriage partner based on frivolous qualities- money, immediate want, self-gratification, and most importantly out of selfish desires for materialism. Yes, many will argue this and may even curse me for saying this bitter truth, but I must continue to ring it like a bell until it sinks into our brains.

How dare you access a man by his present situation, when he is still living, dreaming and working hard? Why are we so impatient in life? Why can’t we ever delay our gratifications? Must we get everything we want now? How many wealthy men you heard off some ten years ago do you still hear making waves today, and how many new millionaires have risen since then? In the early 60s, Ojukwu family was a formidable family that rang bell all through Africa to the extent that the late Col. Odimegwu Ojukwu had the gut to slap a white headmaster during colonial rule for insulting a Nigerian girl. In the 90s, Abiola was a household name that virtually every Nigerian hears before going to sleep, but where are they and their wealthy family names today? Today, we now have Dangote, Adenuga, Bricks, etc…who knows who’s next?

I know your problem, you are afraid of future, so you want to hide your fear of future under the umbrella of an already made man (rich guy), which can hardly help you, cos it doesn't always work; the rich guys now have wisdom too. And this is the reason why you need to get down and start something doing to help yourself and stop waiting for men to run every part of your life.

You are supposed to access a man by his wisdom, dream, creativity, personality, vision and zeal, and not by his present condition. There are so many guys out there with big dreams, but are presently in shaky conditions which they are striving and working to get out from, so why access them based on their present situation?

Yes, it is true that men of today, especially in Nigeria, no longer value and respect women like before, and you want to know why? It is because the women have gradually sold their pride and respect. Remember, you earn respect…so as a woman, work to earn your respect and don’t wait for men to respect you when you are busy disrespecting yourself.

How do we explain the situation of girls telling their school mates, age mates (not necessarily same age, but lets say 2 – 3 yrs gap) that they can’t date them, that they are small boys, simply because those guys don’t have money yet? How do you expect these guys to love a girl genuinely when they finally make the money and find out that they are now the dream of all girls? This is the reason most guys that are financially free in Nigeria flirt and cheat on their lovers and partners. Because the Nigerian women have made men to realize and believe that you are only a dream man of every Nigerian woman when you have money, no matter how shabby your character and personality may be. So men now capitalize on this to run around with different women even when they are married.

Let’s not go too far, enough said on this…

Attitude: do you know that your attitude towards a guy you are dating can cause the guy to change from either good to bad or bad to good? Be watchful of your attitude, don’t always assume that your physical beauty will see you through…sometimes it doesn’t work that way; sometimes men want more than physical beauty, they want confidant, respect, value, humility, a partner that can inspire and motivate them to achieve their dreams. Or don’t you know that a woman’s love can inspire a man to greatness? If you don’t know, know it today that your love can inspire that poor guy to become the next Aliko Dangote!

Follow "Ng Blog" on facebook for more inspirational articles, stay inspired, merry xmas!

3 comments:

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  3. Dis is a great work man. I belief d@ we've learnt one or two things again on how best to hold and preserve our relationships. Thanx man.

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